They go on from there. It's really a very polite rejection of my application.
So. I finally know. After putting all future planning on hold since last October, I finally know where I'll be this summer, this fall, this year and the next.
I do feel some relief from that. The frustrating part of all of the educational applications I make is the waiting, the apply-in-October/find-out-in-April cycle that government programs operate on. I am a planner, not just to satiate my control issues but because I take a great deal of comfort in looking forward to what I have planned, to my next adventure.
And I think that's where most of my disappointment is coming from now. Now I know that everything's going to stay the same. Same job, same house, same speech meets and drama plays and cycles of crazy-busy months after months of gaping nothingness. It's a good life, but I was really hoping for a change.
Now I know.