Come Rain or Come Shine

I met Emily my freshman year of college (13 years ago!). We graduated early together and celebrated with a wild (for us anyway) 6-week backpacking trip through Europe. That trip cemented our friendship. She's one of those friends who I can go weeks without talking to (not by choice! We just haven't lived in the same state for years), but we can click again immediately on sight, updating each other on our lives; our families; our plans; and our memories of bedbugs in Rome, Scottsmen in a pool in Venice, Guy Friday tours in Dover, gummies and caviar with Thor on a train, and Muppet bugs in Smurflet huts.

Which is why I was so excited to go visit her last weekend. While she lived in Grand Junction, I got to hang out with her every time I went home to see my parents. Sadly, that was not to last. She moved to Mount Vernon, WA a few months ago with her family. I figured my spring break was an excellent time to see her and see a bit of the northwest.

I was met at the airport by three very mysterious figures in fedoras and sunglasses. Caitlyn (5) cried, "Manda!" wrapped her arms around my legs, and asked, "Did you bring the swimming pool?" She is a big fan of my parents' house still, it seems.

We marked the first day with trips to three different grocery stores: Whole Foods for lunch at their salad bar, the Co-Op in Mt. Vernon for fun, and Hagaan's for fish and chips for the grown-ups' dinner.

Saturday started slow - I hung out with Caitlyn and Logan watching Curious George cartoons while Emily slept in. Logan wasn't feeling too hot, so we didn't really get going until the afternoon. Fortunately, Ben had finished his work for the day as well by then, so he could join us for our adventure.

We drove north to Bellingham to see a sculpture garden.


It was chilly but not raining, and the flora was beginning to bloom:




Logan still wasn't feeling great, but that didn't deter out next destination... another grocery store! No, seriously. This time it was Trader Joe's. Caitlyn and I shopped for treats while Emily, Ben, and Logan got more nutritious fare:



While driving around Bellinghmam we spied an enticing sign: Artisan Cheese. Thus we discovered Quel Fromage and sampled many of their wares. Thus, after taking a gorgeous senic route home along the sound,



the grownups got another grownup dinner - this:



along with orange chicken from Trader Joe's, which we enjoyed while watching the BBC's The Scarlet Pimpernel.

Ultimate-Husband Ben had Monday off work, so he offered to watch the kiddos while Emily and I could run away to Seattle for a few days. Sunday morning we loaded up the car, swung by their church so Emily could fulfill her calling (she's RS secretary and a slave of duty), and drove to the Emerald City.

Emily booked us a room at a lovely hotel with an excellent location. After dropping off the car and our luggage, we ran through this fountain:



on our way to find lunch (gyros and baklava - yum!) at Pikes Place Market:



Then on to the Seattle Art Museum!

We saw a special exhibit on Calder, a Korean Dress Outfit made of dogtags, a giant rat sitting on a sleeping man's chest, and this



We also found the hands-on section for kids. And for us, of course.



Like good visitors to the Pacific Northwest, we sought out seafood for dinner. At Ivar's Acres of Clams, we discovered the joy of happy hour. We ordered several discounted ocean-based entrees to share:



but declared the argula, beets, and goat cheese salad with vanilla vinaigrette the winner of the meal.

We called it an early night, walked back to the hotel along the waterfront,



and settled in to watch Iron Chef while eating gourmet popcorn in bed.

Monday we ate several breakfasts while enjoying the sights of Pikes Place Market:


(Cinnamon Roll with slices of apple baked in!)


(The Flowers!)


(A Dentist!)


(The Pig!)

We also found a little used bookstore in there, run by a delightful Russian fellow. From there, we walked to Pioneer Park, stopping off to buy umbrellas since, being Seattle, it had decided to rain.



We walked to Pioneer Park, enjoying the sights,



shopping for fun vintage-inspired clothes, and browsing a mystery bookstore.

We capped off the day by visiting this favorite place of mine



by finding some excellent Thai food at a restaurant near the University, and by stopping off at a third bookstore (a huge Barnes and Noble's) to browse with steamed milks in hands.

Oh! We also found a haberdashery and got ourselves a little style



Caitlyn modeled my hat for me the next morning:



It was a sad morning, since I had to fly home. Logan executed his best grumpy face



and I bid a sad farewell to Emily and the kiddos.



Exactly how I feel, Cailtyn!

In short, it was an excellent trip, the Walls make excellent hosts, and I couldn't be luckier than to have Emily as a friend.



Thanks, Walls!

Someday

I have all kinds of plans and all kinds of words ready for posts about my spring break. Really, I do. Except I'm rather tired, a bit grumpy from being completely burned out at school, and desperately needing to go to bed to find the resolve to go back to work tomorrow.

So.

I'll be back as soon as I can to tell you all about statue gardens and running through fountains and Addams Family and trying to eat a dinner that's staring at me through bushy garnishes.

There's a good reason I'm tired, and that's good. Just not so much for the blog.

Everybody's Gotta Be Somewhere

Just a quick check-in tonight -

I got back from a fantastic weekend with Emily in Seattle yesterday. Hanging out with her and her family was tons of fun, and I'll tell you all about it after I get back from my next adventure.

Happy Spring!

Spring, Spring, Spring

SNOW DAY!

AND they called it tonight at 9:00, instead of waiting for 5:30 AM. Given the four inches of snow outside my balcony already in the last two hours, they could have called it a while ago. But I'll take what I get.

AND I took a gamble and drove home today instead of staying in MT. Fourth snow day of the year, and it's the first where I get to sleep in my own bed.

AND I made cranberry apple crisp tonight. Which has nothing to do with the snow day other than the blizzard outside made me want a warm, nutty, buttery, fruity dessert.

AND I get to turn off all of my morning alarms and go to bed! And sleep as long as I want! And then get up and do laundry and pack to go see Emily!

SNOW DAY! Nuh nuh nuh nuh Nuh nuh nuh nuh SNOW DAY!

(That's the Batman theme, if you couldn't tell.)

Pretty Little Picture

Do you know Miranda? She's pretty spiffy, and I don't get to hang out with her nearly as often as I'd like to.

She threw the baby shower for my sister this weekend (along with Sarah, another awesome lady). As I predicted, it was ridiculously cute. Seriously. Just take a look at these pictures, if you don't believe me.

She also took the picture below of my sister, my mom, and me. Look at how pretty my mom is! Look at how adorable my sister is with curly hair! Look at the glimpse of the skirt that I made last weekend (without a pattern, I must add)!


Yup, Miranda's adorable. I envy her color-taste. And her macaron-making skills. And her skirts. And her camera. Is bad, my camera envy.

Mean to Me

Last Thursday the superintendent sent out an email saying (and I paraphrase):

Due to the Winter Warning forecast, tomorrow might be a school closure as a result of snow.

Now, I appreciate his attempts to communicate. Really, it's nice when the administration lets us know what's going on.

However, this was just mean. If there is a snow day, we would know it when it was called. If there's not, you just have a lot of disappointed/upset students and teachers at school on Friday, wishing for what might have been.

The drama class play was Thursday night (it went well by the students' standards, not so hot by mine). I left the school at about 9:00. There wasn't any sign of snow other than that strange, oppressive warmth that comes before a storm here. It was brewing and it was going to be a doozy. All of the parents and students were buzzing about the possible snow day at the show, asking if anyone's heard anything yet.

As I drove away, I had a dilemma. If I drove all the way home that night, I knew it wouldn't be a snow day and I'd have a hellish commute in the morning. If I stayed at the condo as planned, it'd certainly be a snow day and I'd be stuck up there.

I got dinner at the Subway at the gas station, checking my phone constantly with the hope that they'd call it early. I went to the condo, thinking that if they called it before I was asleep, I could still throw everything back into the car and head down the mountain. I went to bed with no sign of snow and a silent phone.

At 5:30 in the morning, they called a snow day.

At 10:00 that morning, I braved the roads to make it home. It wasn't the worst drive I've done (Thanksgiving '08) - there were a few times when my brakes didn't stop my car from going forward, especially on the driveway down from the condo. Fortunately, I have no pride when it comes to driving - I was totally fine with being the slowest car on the road.

Once I got home, I worked out for an episode of Torchwood, then tackled the mountain of dishes in my kitchen. My dishwasher stopped working a few weeks ago, and I've been slowly working my way through all of my dishes since then. It took me three hours (and four more episodes of Torchwood), but I cleaned and dried every one of my dishes, plus a few loads of laundry, and made lemon squares for the baby shower.

Not the most exciting of snow days, but much needed. I got to spend Saturday hanging out with my family, feeling much less guilty about the state of my house.

I was going to vacuum Saturday morning, but Rachel called me up and said, "I'm going to go get a manicure/pedicure and I want you to come," so I did that instead. See?

(Also of interest - how much I love Emma Thompson in the Harry Potter movies and how much my cat (that dark blur behind my feet) loves the fireplace)

It was a nice weekend AND! we only have four days of school to get through this week before a very-much-needed spring break.

P.S. There's a 70% chance of snow on Tuesday this week. What are the odds of another snow day?

P.P.S. One of the bishopric wives at church today grabbed my arm and said, "I have a picture in my purse of who you look like! I'll go get it!" and ran off. She caught up with me again later and presented me a picture of Neve Campbell. "You're just like her! Your mannerisms, the way your eyes scrunch up when you smile, everything!"

Really?

Hmm.

Children Sing, Priests Chant

Remember how I wanted to go to Africa? How I was all dead-set on it, this time it was going to happen, I need to go?

I've had qualms. Financial ones, specifically. Although I was prepared emotionally/spiritually to spend practically all of my savings on this trip, I just can't squelch that practical side of me. It goes against all of my instincts and upbringing to spend my savings like that.

I spent some time researching other options, and I think I've come up with one. If it comes together, I'll give you more details. Essentially, I'm thinking Thailand (I just keep flip-flopping between those two T-countries!). But this is with a different company. It's a little precarious, since unlike CCS and Pueblo Ingles, I don't know anyone who's worked with this particular company before. But I like their structure, the options they're offering, and I like that I can do at least a month's program for $500 less than 3 weeks with CCS. Plus, plane tickets to Bangkok are a heck of a lot cheaper than tickets to Dar Es Salaam. Go figure.

There's two options I'm looking at with this company. One is a "Volunteer Vacation" - a week of cultural orientation (language classes, history lectures, see the sights, visit a market, take a cooking class, etc.), then a week or more of volunteering (probably teaching English either to monks or at orphanages). The second option is a "Buddhist Immersion Experience". I would go live in a Buddhist temple, spending part of my day teaching English to the monks in the university there and part of it learning how to meditate/chant.

I think I want to do both. The first one is more what I was looking for originally - a way to get to know the culture through tourism and volunteering. But, oh! The thought of doing something as wild as "I'm going to live in a Buddhist monastery and meditate for three hours a day" - it scares me in that way that makes me want to make myself do it. Like a Turkish bath (Man, I'd do that again in a heartbeat!).

I want to discuss this more with my advisers (i.e.: my parents). I'll keep you posted, of course.


A run-down of other news:

- We're in day 6 of 8 for CSAPs right now. Aside from the political, philosophical, and pedagogical problems with state tests, they're FREAKIN' BORING!

Seriously. The students complain, and I point out that at least they get to take tests. I have to WATCH them take tests. We're not allowed to grade papers or read or do anything other than watch the students take the tests. I mean, seriously.


- My drama class is performing on Thursday. Today's run through was rather awful, and I'm still very lassiez-faire about the whole thing. Props not found, posters not made, no sound effects, many lines forgotten/unlearned, and I walk away from class each day with a general "Meh." They can do it and be awesome or they can do it and suck. Or somewhere in between. Whatever. It's their call.


- The musical on the other hand I care more about, although I'm not near panic time yet. That'll be after spring break. I worked with the soloists today. The kid playing Agwe has this amazing, deep, resonate voice. Deep as in he hits a D two octaves below middle C. And holds it all dramatically. It's really cool.

Another cast member quit this week, though. Well, quit as in stopped showing up and his friends say he's not going to do it because he wants to play rugby instead.

I told the friends to tell him he's being an irresponsible coward by not coming to tell me to my face.

Do you see why I would not make a good elementary school teacher?


- My sister's baby shower is Saturday. If the invitations are any indication, it's going to be a remarkably adorable event. I had all kinds of awesome plans for handmade gifts. Probably isn't going to happen this week. I also have awesome plans for homemade lemon squares. They will probably be from a box, if not store-bought (Oh! I can feel the female crafty-baking-bloggers wincing at those words, judging me just for typing that. The guilt! It's palpable, I tell you!).

No worries - I'll make it up to the kid by chanting at him in Thai.

By Threes

For balance after my last post, here's three pictures of things that made me happy:


Sheets!


A handy tip for you theater teachers out there: If you're willing to make a lot of phone calls, you can get free sheets!

I first tried this trick for my theater at DPJH a few years ago. I called about 10 hotels before hitting the jackpot - 100 free sheets! We used them for everything - painting drop cloths, giant Seussical puppets, ghosts, movie screens, all kinds of stuff.

I handed my MTHS assistants a list of 30 hotels in the greater Denver area earlier this week. They were quite dubious when I told them to ask for housekeeping and then ask if they had any sheets they could donate to a high school. That is, they doubted me until one housekeeping manager said, "Sure. How many would you like?"

And so I drove downtown today and left with 50 free sheets and an offer for more anytime I wanted them, just in time for my drama class' performance of a scene from "Funny Thing" next week. Togas, here we come!


Lights!


When I bought my Vibe it was still under warranty until April. I figured I would drive it around for a few months to figure out all the kinks, then I'd take it in for repairs before the warranty ran out. With April just around the corner and a busy next few weeks, the time had come.

The problem, though, as always, is figuring out how to get around without my car. Today was a teacher work day, which meant no rehearsal, which meant I could carpool with Tiffany and John, which minimized the driving, but there was still some transportation needed.

I looked into car rentals, but at $40 a day, I was very reluctant.

Then I called the dealer I was taking my car to. They told me they would "arrange transportation" for me.

I dropped my car off last night to discover that the warranty actually covers a rental car as well! Within twenty minutes my car was in the shop and I was in a white car from Enterprise heading home. Woot!

I had a marvelously quiet work day of grading papers, 504 accommodation meetings, previewing Terry Jones' Medieval Lives episodes, and filing papers. Tiffany decided she wanted to go home early, so we took off down the mountain a little after 2:00 (man, I love teacher work days - I got tons done and we got to leave early!). I headed over to the dealer to check on my car.

My list of repairs and their results:

Brakes are squealing off and on
- They checked them and cleaned them, all's well

One of the lights in the radio's display is burned out
- They ordered in a new radio today and installed it

One of the cubbies pops open every time I go over a bump
- They tweaked it as much as they could, and have ordered a new one for a better fit

Something rattles every time the heat/cooling system's on (which was my biggest complaint - the constant rt-rt-rt-rt-rt-rt-rt sound drives me batty!)
- At first, the tech guy couldn't hear it. Then the owner of the store checked it out, and she could hear it. Then a third tech guy tried, and he could hear it, too. They think it's the blower motor, since it gets louder when they press on that. A new one is on it's way.

When I got to the shop, they were still working on it (they had asked me to swing by so I could help them identify the rattling sound, but found it right before I got there). They called Enterprise to pick up my rental for me, and I graded two more sets of assignments while I waited for them to put the dash back together. Then they washed my car for me, which was very nice and much needed after a week of peeling up the muddy hill to the MT condo, and promised to call as soon as both of the ordered parts were in.

I left to pick up said sheets without paying a dime. Best warranty ever!


Eden!


This week I split my Humanities class into pairs and assigned each pair one of 14 Bible-Stories-to-Know-to-Get-Western-Culture. They had to research the story, write a summary for me, then come up with an entertaining way to teach the story to the class without using any written language, illiterate Dark Age peasants that they are.

Some of the presentations were lousy, obviously done without much thought. Some were hilarious in both good and bad ways. Some just made me want to watch a movie again (the Moses group showed the opening scene of "The Prince of Egypt"). Some made me look twice when I realized that was David Cross:



And one group made me absolutely delighted when they showed up to class toting two bags of stuffed animals, two naked Cabbage Patch Kids, a bunch of fruit, and two trees on a push cart. "It's Eden!" they said, matching my own excitement while the kids who had slacked on their projects looked on with apprehension and fear.

Don't Dream It

I had a vivid dream two nights ago. I'll spare you most of the details, since it was long and windy and manifested all kinds of school and social anxieties.

At one point, Rachel, Jason, and I stopped at an outdoor cafe in the mountains. They sat down at a wrought-iron table while I ducked inside to wash my hands, pleased that we were hanging out together. Just as I joined them again, a strange-looking elongated van pulled up alongside the cluster of tables. The middle window rolled down and a shadow inside started shooting. Simultaneously I felt two shots hit my neck, slipped from my chair while worried about Rachel, and I jerked awake (quite literally - in my sudden flailing, I flung my laptop, which had been next to me on the bed, to the floor. Luckily no damage was done.)

Ever since then my neck's been killing me. Not in a bullet-wound kind-of-way, but stiff, sore, and all kinds of muscle-y stress.

Hmm.

Do You Wanna Dance?

Have I told you how awesome my sister is?

Hanging out with my sister is probably my favorite perk of living in Denver. This Saturday, for example. We went to see a matinee of Alice in Wonderland (meh for the movie - aside from the occasional awesome Burtonesque visual image, this review pretty much sums up my disappointed sentiments), got dinner at Parisi's, ran to the grocery store (we both needed to), and then went back to her place to watch Every Little Step. I definitely recommend that one if you're into theater/dance (especially to you, Kelley), and not just because you get to watch Tyce Diorio not get cast because of his ego (I'll be much happier with So You Think You Can Dance when they get Susan Stroman to show them what the Broadway dance style is supposed to look like).

It was a great way to spend the latter part of the day. There just isn't that many people who would agree with my opinions on Alice AND want to watch a documentary about A Chorus Line AND share a mutual fondness for Kevin Kline just because of his turn as a Pirate King.

Sunday night I joined Rachel, Ben, the Walkers, and others at Brian's house for his annual Oscars party. Good food, snarky comments - 'twas worth staying up two hours past my bedtime.

When I dragged my tired self out of bed this morning to drive to school, the one thing I was looking forward to today was getting to see my sister again. She is choreographing three dances for our musical and has come about once a week to teach my white mountain town students some African dance moves. She covered the opening song of the show today, and I really like where it's going. Her philosophy is "If I can do the move at 7 months pregnant, you can do it!"

So we'll have at least three good dance numbers for the show, I get to watch my sister teach my students (which I get a big kick out of), and I get to see her a little during the week. There's not really a good reason for her to drive and hour and a half on her day off to teach dance to a bunch of distracted high schoolers, but I'm really glad she's doing it. 'Cause she's awesome.

P.S. For no reason other than wanting to see if they figure it out, I haven't told my students that the choreographer is my sister. It helps that we don't have the same last name and we don't look like we're related. During the first dance rehearsal, though, one girl said, "I can tell that you and Miss Mason are really good friends."

"Oh, yeah?" I said.

"Yeah. You're both very passionate. And energetic. And kind of..." (she does a move very much like Mrs. Fox describing how her son is "different.")

Which I take to be a very nice compliment.

Nobody Here But Us Chickens

I meant to brag about this a few months ago. I didn't, so I'm bragging about it now.

For the children's show my drama class performed in December, one character was supposed to gnaw her way through a bucket of chicken during her scenes. Trickily, the actress playing that part is a vegetarian.

One of the reasons I love theater is the creativity it demands of me. What other circumstances give me puzzles like that to solve?

I picked up a loaf of cheap white bread, peeled off the crusts, leaving some brown bits on for coloring, and started molding.



No chickens were harmed for our show, and she could still eat away to her heart's content. See? I am awesome.

Children and Art

I'm back from three days at the condo (I got to sleep in until 6:00! Three times!) and ready to tell you all about my Humanities class.


Some of the staff at MTHS warned me that students there tend to resent electives that aren't easy-A's. I knew the Humanities course I was planning was much more like a history class than a "just-for-fun" elective. So, I've tried to come up with at least one hands-on project for each unit we've done. I've also tried to take photos along the way so I can share!

Unit One: Pre-History



I hung butcher paper along the hallway outside my room and borrowed chalk from the art teacher to have the students draw symbols and icons for what's most important to them.

Unit Two: Mesopotamia



In small groups, the students created a comic-book style summary of the Epic of Gilgamesh (each group had their own tablet to do).

Unit Three: Egypt



I laid a grid over this famous illustration from the Papyrus of Hunefer and cut the picture up into 1x1 inch squares. Each student got a 5x5 inch square to transfer their square into, without knowing what the final product looked like (I hadn't figured out how to print the original in color at school yet, so I let them pick their own colors - hence the crazy-colored product). An introduction to the Egyptian art style, the Book of the Dead, and also to the use of grid in art.



I gave them a choice for their final project for the Egypt unit - either make your own Book of the Dead (with an account of your life, a description of your post-death journey, and an account of how you will be judged)



or make your own tomb (containing a sarcophagus identifying you, pictures in Egyptian-style of your life, and models of any possessions you want in the after-life).

Unit Four: Greece

No photos this time, I'm afraid. I revived my Adopt-a-God project from DPJH and had them make PowerPoint presentations to cover the myths. They also worked in groups to describe their versions of a Utopian society when we talked Plato.

Unit Five: Rome



Big kudos to my dad for this idea and to my sister for the supplies! To demonstrate the physics of the Roman Aqueducts, the students hooked up IVs to bags of saline and played with gravity. This group was particularly proud when they figured out they could warp the tubes up around the legs of a chair and the water would still flow!



That was yesterday. Today we wrapped up Rome talking about mosaics and I turned them loose on this website to try to make their own. I also taught them about the "Print Screen" function so they could turn in their projects.


Some tried geometric patterns


while others tried to make a picture.

Their "This is hard!" comments made while they continued to click away, engrossed, made me very pleased with this activity.


With an exam on Friday and Rome wrapped up today, I hit my goal of getting us past year 0 by Midterm. Whoo!

By far their favorite project was the aqueducts. They asked if they could do stuff like that everyday. I told them that I tried to come up with something like that for each unit.

"Then we can do more!" Trey said. "Like... build a bicycle. You should give us supplies and we figure out how to make a bicycle!"

Laughing I said, "And how does that fit in?"

Trey and Nick looked at each other, thinking. "You mentioned the Renaissance. Are we going to talk about Leonardo da Vinci?"

"Of course."

"Then we can make a bicycle!"

"And flying machines!" Caedi chimed in.

Their enthusiasm for projects continued today. When I rejected their suggestion that I let them figure out how to build fire ("For pre-history!") and their pleas to show "Saw" in class (because I had cited it as an example of how people's taste for bloody shows hasn't changed), they kept thinking about it as I talked about the Colosseum today.

"We should build one of those," Nick said.

"A colosseum?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"I don't think that'll go over well with the administration," I said.

"We can do it, like, underground. And then use it, like the Romans," he continued.

"An underground Colosseum? I don't have supplies for that."

"Nah, I mean underground like secret. That way the administration won't care."

"Ah. So the first rule of the underground Colosseum is you do not talk about the underground Colosseum?" My joke fell completely flat.

"It'll be awesome," Trey said, joining in Nick's dream. "We can spread sand and everything like the Romans."

"It would be interesting..." I said, playing along. "But who would be the emperor who decides who lives?"

Half the kids immediately volunteered; Nick vocally. "Me! I'm the one who came up with this project!"

"And who would be the slaves fighting for your entertainment?"

Seven or eight of the students said in chorus, "The freshmen."


If any of you have ideas for more aqueduct-y projects for the rest of history, do tell! I'm already planning on sticking paper on the bottom of desks to have them paint a la Sistine Chapel, but the Dark Ages come first.

Being Alone

Pam, the bishop's wife, called me last night because she had noticed that I hadn't signed up for the ward's dinner groups this month. She invited me to come to their house for dinner tomorrow night, so I wouldn't be left out.

"Unless you didn't want to come," she said, laughing at the thought.

I laughed with her, more feebly. The thing is, I didn't want to go. Sure, I've enjoyed the dinner groups I have attended, but I only attend them out of obligation - I don't want to go, but I do because I feel like I should want to go, you know?

I was reading online about the Meyers-Briggs personalities, which I just recently tried a test for. It listed me as INTJ, and on Wikipedia (which I feel guilty citing as a source, teacher that I am) it explains that Introverts "generally prefer interacting with a few close friends rather than a wide circle of acquaintances, and they expend energy in social situations (whereas extraverts gain energy)."

That's it precisely! I have a hard time explaining to church-people why I don't want to go to a fireside/activity/dinner group on Sundays after a five-hour church setting. It's not that I don't have fun, it's that I get so drained by such things. People are often surprised when I tell them I'm introverted. I can be social, but it's exhausting, like playing a character for several hours. I can act that way long enough to do my calling on Sundays, but to then summon the energy to do it Sunday night as well before heading off for another week of work (which, while also enjoyable, does involve being around mass groups of people all day)? It's just too much for me most of the time.

It was one of those realizations that's so simple and obvious I should have figured it out a while ago. That's why there are so many activities and social engagements - some people (and I'm certain they're the ones planning them) actually gain energy from such things. And it also makes sense why some people, like Pam, just don't understand that sometimes I just don't want to go to another dinner group.

Whether it's fortunate or not, I now have a legitimate reason to not attend tomorrow night. They're predicting snow all day tomorrow and Monday for our area, so I've decided to drive up to the MT condo right after church tomorrow to simplify the commute to school Monday.

P.S. I hadn't been reading very much for a few weeks, and I know that I do get more anxious and unsettled when I'm not reading enough. No books had been catching my attention lately. I needed something that was engaging and easy, so I pulled the last three Harry Potter books from my shelf this week and burrowed into them. I started the last one last night and neglected many of the things I ought to have been doing to finish it today (although I was good enough to put it down and go to lunch and a movie with a friend). I'm all moody, as usual when I finish a book like that, but I feel a lot more put-together mentally than I've been in a while.

High Hopes

My plans for the summer keep shifting in and out of tangibility. The latter part of my summer is filling up - Mercedes is coming to visit in July, then my little brother's getting married July 31, then I have the whole Cedar City thing in the wee smalls of August before school starts again.

Still, that leaves the beginning of the summer open (aside from the arrival of Rachel's baby sometime in late May), and I very much want to fill it with some interesting trip somewhere.

As you may recall, I wanted to go to Africa. The cost of the Cross-Cultural Solutions program (which is certainly one of the most expensive programs out there) and the cost of the plane ticket to Tanzania, though, pushed that goal out of reach. I've been saving for the trip, but I took a pay cut to work at MTHS which is making the funding a bit trickier than my Yay, 30! trip.

In lieu of my volunteering in Africa, Jason and I talked about taking another adventuresome trip together this summer, since the one last summer went so well. We were talking by phone a few weeks ago and he mentioned that he'd like to firm up travel plans for the summer. I told him that I wanted to travel, but I just couldn't make any plans to spend that kind of money while my job situation at school was uncertain. He said he'd send out some feelers to other friends then in the meantime.

I thought about it that night, did some plane-ticket searching, and sent him a proposal for a trip to Japan in June the next day. I had found some good ticket prices, and I figured I would be comfortable with a shorter, frugal trip in spite of the employment question.

Unfortunately, Jason's friends were much more responsive than either of us had anticipated - in the 24-hours it took me to decide on an amount I could spend, he had already made travel plans with different people.

Since then, as you know, I feel much more confident in my continued employment and also just as eager to find some interesting trip to take in June. Africa is still there, calling to me like Bloody Mary in the back of my mind, but even with the seeming assurances from my principal that I'll be working at MTHS next year, it will come at a cost. They're freezing all salaries and most likely reducing benefits, which means I'll have more costs next year with no increase. (But I'll still have a job, which I am certainly grateful for.)

I was planning to take some time this weekend to look into other volunteer programs. Pueblo Ingles is a possibility again; but although I loved my experience there last summer, I'd rather do something new. There is that French village thing, but tickets to Europe aren't cheap theses days.

However, I got an email this evening from CCS. They're doing some sort of promotional program for their alumni where certain dates and placements will be given this summer for 1/3 the cost. I wrote them back, asking for more details. Perhaps the stars are aligning?

My New Philosophy

In Humanities today we covered Plato's theory of Ideas.

I talked them through the Allegory of the Cave (using an overhead projector and Indonesian Shadow Puppets) (Because I'm always looking for an excuse to whip out my Indonesian Shadow Puppets, that's why).

We talked about it in concrete forms (horse v. Horse), then brainstormed a list of non-concrete capital-letter concepts (Love, Death, Victory, Freedom, Beauty, etc.).

The students each picked one of those capitalized concepts and tried to write a description of what the ideal, perfect version of that concept would be (I am aware of the irony and the impossibility of such a task, but the kids needed a writing break).

Then I pulled out my red-polka-dot turn-to-talk ball and we had a modest Socratic Seminar about their thoughts. It went pretty well, for such a reluctant-to-talk class. At one point, the group had decided that

1) an ideal Life is happy,
that
2) Happiness is overcoming challenges or obstacles,
that
3) Death is ideal when you don't know it's coming, is quick, and comes after great accomplishments,
and that
4) Victory is when you are the best you'll ever be, but that moment is fleeting.

"So," I said, "does that mean we should shoot gold medalists at the Olympics' awards ceremonies?"

It caused much amusement and astonishment. As do all of my good teacher-comments.


Also discussed today:
Can Honesty exist if there is only one person involved?
Should Ray Gosling be in jail?
If a tree falls in a forest and only the eagle who dropped said tree is around to hear it, did the tree really fall?


"I'm so confused!" one student wailed at one point, dropping his head to the desk.

"Good for you!" I exclaimed, clapping my hands together in delight. "You'd make Socrates proud!"

Tomorrow, Utopia!

Put on a Happy Face

I feel bad whenever I post a blog entry while in my loss-of-joie-de-vivre mood. That's why, almost immediately after publishing last night, I started thinking about the good things I should tell you.

That in mind, let me catch you up on Making Waves at Cedar City.

I signed the papers today that allows them to make copies of the script. I also read their version of the summative blurb ("This is a "living-newspaper" style production. Think of a teacher who made an impact on you. That is the story we're telling." It's a little awkwardly worded, so we might tighten it, but I like the "living-newspaper" description.) They also need a short bio about me. (Short bio? Have you seen the verbosity of my blog entries where I try to define myself?)

When I talked to the Cedar City guy last week, he was very enthusiastic about the play. Which is very nice. They had already picked out a director for it, which means they already set the dates. I love their choice of the director - I met him a few years ago when I did their summer intensive workshop for secondary teachers. We clicked right away. In fact, he said he had heard of me (such is the fame of a junior high school drama teacher!) and that he felt that we had things do to for each other ahead of us. Except it was worded in a way that was neither creepy nor romantic-sounding, but rather a sweet theatrical-way of saying that there's a kindred spirit spark.

So while I fully supported their director-choice, it made it kind of awkward. Because part of the deal is that I go to Cedar City for a week to work with the actors and director while they're rehearsing, then sit in on the readings and post-show discussions. Which I am totally on board for doing. Except they've scheduled it on top of the first week of school at MTHS.

Duh, duh, DUH!

School next year starts on a Wednesday mid-August. Teachers come back four days in advance (although that will probably be cut to two, budget-crisis and all). I would miss the two teacher work/in-service days, plus the first three days of classes.

"Won't your principal understand? I'll talk to him, if you like. I'll explain that we're a Tony award winning Shakespeare Festival and that this is a big deal," Chuck said when he heard my silent panic over the scheduled dates.

"I just don't know if I can do it," I said, hating those words, dreading the next ones. "Let me go talk to my principal, and I'll call you back."

Do you know how scary it is for me to talk to a principal? Do you know what kind of principals I'm used to? (Meg does! Ben does! Janelle does! Kelley does!)

And before I could procrastinate the scariness/nausea, I did so right away. I went downstairs to the main office and ran right into Mike. I asked if he had a few minutes, and we stepped into his office (Heart! Starts! Beat! Ing! Oh! So! Fast!).

I told Mike about the festival's competition ("So, you know that play I wrote? That I went to Salt Lake City to see last fall? It kind of won this contest.")

He congratulated me on the win.

I explained about the whole artist-in-residence thing.

He said that's great.

I told him the dates of the show.

Without missing a beat he said, "We'll work it out."

"What?" I said. "Really? Because it's the first week of school."

"I know," he said. "But it's a once-in-a-lifetime thing, right? You've got to do it. We'll work it out. You'll get a sub, you'll set the expectations, you already know most of the kids anyway. Do it."

Dude.

Here's the thing. Aside from how awesome my principal is, aside from the fact that I'm going to Cedar City in August to see our play performed, here's the other message I picked up from that:

We're planning on having you here next year.

It's been a perilous, egg-shell-walking month in our district (most districts, really). I, like most teachers, have been waiting to hear that my position is being cut. So when Chuck asked me to go tell my principal that I need to miss the first week of school next year to do a play, I was really worried that Mike would say, "Oh. I've been meaning to talk to you about that. It's not going to be a problem, you see, because...." I mean, what if they were on the fence about keeping me and this request tipped me into the cow-dung of nonrenewal?

Yes, Mike is a great principal who understands that there are bigger things going on sometimes that are worth a little hassle.

Yes, he said I could miss a week to go do those bigger things.

Yes, I get to see my play done at Cedar City.

But most of all, they're planning on having me around next year.

So who am I to complain?


P.S. The other reason they wanted the play to be in that particular slot of dates is it means it will also get the two Friday performances that follow, and they are expecting teachers to come on those days, and they are eager to get the play out to teachers.

P.P.S. I didn't get fired today for taking a sucker away from a kid (which sounds stupid when I type it, but seriously: 24-hours of gut-clenching worry about the yelling and the sucker). The kid came up to the desk I was sitting at during the passing period before class. He sat on a nearby desk and said, "So." Which I knew was his version of an apology.

"So," I replied, with a little bit of a questioning intonation.

"So," he said, in confirmation.

We talked. I asked him if he was confused about the whole no-candy-in-class thing. He wasn't. He explained that he had a really bad day yesterday. I said I understood, that my day was bad, too. I asked if he was going to have any more Dum-Dums in class. He said nope. I said, "Then we're good."

And we are.

There's a Sucker Born Every Minute

My three-day weekend was really nice, but oh! how quickly the restful feeling disappeared.

I didn't sleep that well last night, and I woke up feeling sick. That keeps happening lately.

It was a typical school day, really. I finished putting together scripts for the first period drama class, casted it, and we did a read-through today. The kids are all freaked out because I decided to do something closer to a black box performance rather than a "show" show. Ruth told me flat out that she would do a show every quarter with every drama class because she didn't know what else to do with them to fill the time. I'm moving more towards a skill-building curriculum, but I can't cut the shows quite yet without all kinds of anger and "that's not what we do!"-ness. So I figured this would be a workable compromise. I cut scenes from three plays for the students to do - no set, minimal props, suggestive costumes, but still a chance to tell stories and try new things. But they've never heard of such a performance and it's not what they usually do and they're VERY. CONCERNED. I just keep plugging it with stubborn optimism. I wish they would trust me, though.

Humanities was a wrap-up of Greek Mythology. For review I had them create a family tree of the gods in small groups. I therefore had to chase groups off the computers several times, since they just wanted to Google and copy it. Over and over again I explained that the point of the project was for them to talk to each other, puzzle it out, figure out their notes, and get used to the names and relationships. Copying someone else's work would circumvent the entire point of the process. And over and over again they rolled their eyes at me, grumbled about my/it's stupidity, and looked longingly back at the computer screen.

Freshman drama was wired. I spent part of my lunch picking up the soda cans, coffee mugs, and Dum-Dum sticks that keep getting left behind in my room. So when class started and three of the kids were sucking on those suckers again (I have a no food/drinks-other-than-water rule for my room, as does the whole school), I felt just... tired. I asked them to throw the suckers away, they crunched the candy instead and ate it, then tossed the sticks at the trashcan.

I had decided to try a new unit with this class, given their comedic strengths. We went over the basic Commedia dell'Arte characters, I gave them some example lazzis, then I turned them loose to create their own short Commedia plays using those stock ideas.

They were just so very restless and immature today. While doing the introductory stuff, two girls kept making fart noises, one girl kept moving to sit in her friend's lap, and a group of boys would not stop talking.

When I pulled the groups back together to talk about lazzis and one kid pulled out a second Dum-Dum and stuck it in his mouth, I took a deep breath, made eye contact with him, mimed pulling it out and tossing it, while continuing the discussion. He crunched it again and strolled to the trash can, stating loudly that he would sue me when his teeth broke from eating it too fast.

So when, at the end of the class period, the same kid pulled out a third lollipop and started sucking on it, I was tired of talking and explaining and repeating myself. I was standing close to him, so I just reached out, plucked the sucker from his hand, and tossed it into the trash.

He freaked out. He started yelling at me - yelling about how he's going to sue me, yelling about my being "violent", yelling about how he doesn't want to talk about it. Just, yelling.

I stood by quietly, saying his name in a calm voice. I asked him to step outside the room to talk about it. He yelled some more. The bell rang, I asked him to stay. He yelled as he walked past me out the door, turning around in the hallway to yell back at me "This conversation is OVER! OVER!"

And so I called his mom's cell phone, left a message about what happened in class, looked up what his first period class is so I can catch him before school tomorrow, and went to rehearsal.

And most of the way home I thought about what happened.

And most of the time during my Relief Society errands tonight I thought about what happened.

And tonight I blog about what happened.

And I wait for tomorrow to come so I can make the next move, make things better, and get rid of this hole-punched-in-my-stomach feeling.

I'm tired today.

Jolly Holiday

I celebrated my President's Day by watching a movie about British regents and doing my taxes.

Appropriate, yes?

What about you?

Slippin' Through My Fingers

With parent-teacher conferences Tuesday and Wednesday and the Speech Banquet Thursday, I moved up to Mountain Town for the week.

Tuesday morning I left a little earlier than usual so I could drop the beast off at the condo and turn on the power before school. There is a monster of a hill you have to drive up to get to the condo, and the road's dirt. It had also snowed on Sunday, so the "road" was snow-packed and ice-muddy. My car had made it most of the way up, but was struggling on the last steep little bit when another car appeared at the top.

The driver saw me and my spinning wheels, then backed up. Which was nice of her.


But then she kept backing up. And then her car slid backwards over the top of the hill, disappearing out of sight.

My tires finally caught some traction and I made it to the crest. I threw my car in park and jumped out to help. It turns out it was Jane, a teacher at my school. Apparently, she just panicked and backed up way too far. She was distraught and shaken up and couldn't really explain why she had backed up so unnecessarily.

Luckily, her car had caught on the side of the hill, so I could reach down and help her (awkwardly) up. Her husband was just heading out to walk the dogs, and was quickly on hand to help. He offered to call the tow truck while I offered to drive Jane to school. Which I did, as soon as I dropped the cat off.

It was a relief to stay at the condo all week, given the 7-minute commute and the extra time to sleep in. That hill was a battle, though. I came very close to giving up Tuesday night and parking at the bottom of it. I made it up in the end, after three running starts and one very long revving of the engine while my tires spun madly and I coaxed out loud, "Come on, car. Come on, car!" Then, when I suddenly lurched past the slickest part and made the turn, I burst out with "Oh, Good Car! Oh, Good Car!" while stroking the dashboard.

The hill thawed as the week went on, so Tuesday was by far the worst of it. It was not the end of my adventures with ice, though.

After rehearsal on Thursday I had about an hour before the speech banquet began. It was a pot luck dinner, but apparently it was my job to provide drinks and paper items. I had stocked up on sodas, plates, napkins, and so on at Wal-Mart before moving up the mountain, but I hopped in my car to buy some ice at the gas station in downtown Mountain Town (such as it is).

I walked back into the foyer outside the auditorium to find several panicking cheerleaders gathered around one of their own, seizing on the ground. The seizure ended very quickly, and the cheer coach knelt by the girl's head, told one of the girls to call 911, and asked "someone go get some ice".

I had stripped off my coat by this point, said, "Here you go," as I offered up an 8-pound bag of ice cubes, and began folding up my scarf to wrap the ice in.

I've never experienced people looking at me like I'm a miracle before.

I helped the coach administer some first aid, gave the flock of cheerleaders something to do to get them out of the room, and waited out the arrival of the EMTs. Turns out the girl had not eaten anything nor had much to drink all day, which caused her to pass out while dancing. She hit her head on the cement floor when she dropped, which caused the seizure.

Some of the cheerleaders stopped by my room on Friday to see if I wanted to sign a get-well card for the girl. "It was awesome," they said as I wrote a little note on the card. "You just, like, appeared out of nowhere. With ice! It was like you knew exactly what we needed and just, like, appeared."

I shrugged modestly. "Well, I'm good like that," I said, smiling as I handed the card back.

I figured it's a good opportunity to spread a little mystery - let them wonder about my magical abilities/god-like powers a little. Those are the kinds of rumors I cultivate as a teacher.


Conferences were a complete waste of time, by the way. 10 extra hours at school, for a total of five meetings with parents, each lasting no more than 10 minutes. Plus, I was too worn out from teaching all day to use the time there to plan or grade or anything. I made some cuttings for the drama class play, printed certificates for the speech banquet, and accomplished some other mindless tasks, but it was largely a waste of time. As spring conferences so often are.

The speech banquet went well, though. A lot of people turned out, I spent the dinner part of it talking set designs for the musical with two of the parents, a few kids performed, I handed out awards and letters, and we kept it to under 2 hours total. I'm thrilled to have the season over with finally, though. Oh, and the kids very sweetly got me a bouquet of flowers, which they presented at the end. That was nice of them. It almost made up for the article written by one of my speech kids for the local paper that led with the line "The [MTHS] speech team did it again, despite having a first-year speech coach who had never coached speech before."

A Writer

I was going to wait until I had more details to tell you this, but I'm too excited to wait.

When I switched my phone back on after rehearsal today, I managed to snag just enough of a signal in the parking lot for it to say I had a message. The area code was for Cedar City. "No way," I thought.

About 10 seconds worth of the message had downloaded before it lost signal again (I get nothing at school), just enough for me to hear:

"Hello, (my name)! This is Charles Metten from the Cedar City New Summit Play Competition. We've been reading and studying your play, Making Waves-"

And then the message cut off. Damn you Mountain Town and AT&T for your weak rural signal!

I hopped in my car and drove 10 miles until I picked up a signal again.

"We love it. It's one of the best plays we've read in a long time. We're very excited to do a stage reading of it this summer as part of our festival. Call me back at (number) as soon as possible so we can talk about dates."

!!!

It was after 5. I tried anyway, and his secretary suggested I call again tomorrow, which I will during my consultation. But when I gave her my name she said, "Oh, of Making Waves, right?"

!!!!!

I'll post more when I know more, I promise.

Dude! What is it?

Yes!! Finally!

By Threes

I have three (THREE!) cold sores on my bottom lip at the moment. That makes four cold sores in the last week.

Do you think my body's trying to tell me something?

Yes. Yes I am.

(This photo is dedicated to blog-pictures-of-herself-shy Miranda, who posted a decidedly cute picture today.)



When I got home from school yesterday after spending Wednesday night up in Mountain Town, I found cat vomit in my bed.

Do you think my cat's trying to tell me something?

Yes. Yes, I am.

I don't have a speech meet tomorrow. I do have a bagful of papers to grade before Conferences next week, and I'm going to talk to Rachel about the choreography for the musical; but first I am going to take Brenda's suggestion and stay in bed until "after McDonald's stops serving breakfast."

Am I inspired by Emily's haiku?

Yes. Yes, I am.

Good Night and Thank You

I was paged to the main office right after school let out today, but called instead. I was in the other building, about to start auditions, so I didn't want to have to run across the parking lot at that moment. The secretary said there was a delivery for me, and offered to drop it off. In between auditions about 20 minutes later, I got this lovely bouquet of flowers with a thank you note from the parents of one of my speech kids.

My principal was grinning when I got to school this morning, and he congratulated me whole-heartedly.

Former coach Ruth sent a lovely email to my principal and my superintendent, who forwarded it to the school board, raving about how great and "well-coached" the kids were.

My dean stopped by to find out how it went. He said he was proud, that he knew I had big shoes to fill, but that I should remember that I have big shoes, too.

One student said "Thank you" as I got off the bus Saturday.

And I started to feel better.

My conflicted feelings Saturday were, in part, due to exhaustion. I'm still tired. But there were other factors:

1. Ruth showed up at the meet. And I love her, and I was excited to see her, but I was also very, very hurt. I had spent the entire season living in her shadow, and just when the end was in sight and I thought we might be successful enough for me to crawl out from under it, she shows up and it became all about her again. The kids were ecstatic to see her (which was part of the problem - she got to be with them and watch them perform while I had to work in the tab room all day. I didn't even seen my team until the awards ceremony!), and I wanted to be glad for them, but I reacted in a very selfish way to her rather selfish decision ("I just couldn't stay away from the kids anymore!").

2. When I went back into the tab room, all hurt and angry at Ruth, I looked around the room at all of the other coaches who have been very gracious and kind all year and realized how very alone I was. I was at an event surrounded by hundreds of people, and I couldn't talk to a single one of them about how upset I was. They cared about me, but I knew they would be loyal to Ruth, their friend of 20 years. This ties in with

3. My realization a week or so ago how isolated most of my time is. This came to me in church when we were being pushed to have "quality gospel conversations" with people. I haven't really talked religion with anyone in a while, and I realized that was because I was spending so much time at work (and I'm certainly not going to have gospel conversations with my students). The other teachers are perfectly nice, and I could see some of them being great friends, but I don't think non-teachers realize that teachers get very little time to talk to colleagues. That plus minimal socializing outside of school amplified my sense of isolation.

4. My bishop, upon hearing the news of our win Sunday morning, said, "Congratulations! Was it worth all of the lack of sleep?" and I suddenly realized, "No. No, it's not." Which makes a predicament I need to sort out.

5. A friend at church congratulated me on the win by sarcastically saying, "Hey, that's great! You didn't run the program into the ground!" thereby verbalizing my fears and insecurities about the whole thing. Woo.

However, the thanks of that one student (out of 25! I reached a new level of empathy for the lepers story), the grin of my principal, the email sent to my bosses, and the bouquet of flowers on my bookshelf went a long way to help me push past the hurt, angry, unappreciated feelings.

Plus, today we started auditions. And THAT I know how to do.


P.S. A mom texted me yesterday to see if I could help organize a party for the speech team this weekend (as a preliminary to the banquet I'm organizing for the team in two weeks). I wanted to reply, with a sob, "But this is my first speech-free Saturday in four months!" Instead, I was very good and offered what help I could. And I was rewarded - they had a scheduling conflict and changed their minds about hosting the party. Hurrah!

With So Little to Be Sure Of

19 awards, 3 Best of Events, Top Team in the State

Yay, but also many conflicted feelings, which may be largely due to exhaustion. I'll sort through them here later. For now, bed.

Still, good for the kids.

Our State Fair

I'm at school right now in my consultation period. I have tons I could be doing, but I'm more nervous than I thought I would be about the State Speech Meet, so I thought I'd write a bit here before diving into work.

We leave in a little over an hour for the Meet. Well, first we'll stop off for lunch, then run to the hotel to check in/change clothes, and then go to the Meet. It's a two day event - today's events will be

• Original Oratory
• Poetry Interpretation
• Humorous Literature Interpretation
• Dramatic Literature Interpretation
• Solo Acting and
• Impromptu Speaking
  

Three rounds of each starting at 3:00, plus finals that will hopefully start by 8:00 tonight.

Tomorrow we start at 8:15 and compete in

• Public Forum Debate
• One to One Value Debate
• Creative Storytelling
• Dramatic Duet Acting and
• Humorous Duet Acting

Again, three rounds of each plus finals. Awards are scheduled for 4:00 pm tomorrow.

The 25 kids who are going have been great about working this week. We've strategized, planned, plotted, and shuffled people around to different events. We've got strong people in every event (except PF Debate - we're not competing in that one this year), including several who've won in the past.

I'm conflicted with this, as I have been all year. I'm proud of my students and I want them to do their best. I had a talk with them on Monday about the factors that affect scoring - there are the ones they can control (memorization, performance, amount of practice going in, etc.) and the ones they can't control (the judge's opinions and biases). Still, I know that if the team doesn't take first in the state overall, they're going to be really disappointed. Ridiculous, yes, since they're competing against 20+ other schools. Still, they think highly of themselves, which is both good and bad.

They're excited, though, and nervous. Heck, I'm excited and nervous.

To be honest, I want them to take first just to prove that I'm as good as the old teacher. I know how irrational that is, and I know that I've done a damn fine job given all of the obstacles of this year (including my remarkable lack of experience). Still, I really want to have that first place status to be able to point at and say "See?"

Either way, I'll let you know how it goes.

Better

In my crazy yesterday, I had noticed that my office phone was blinking with a message.

Today I had time to check it. When the electronic lady said, "You have a message from... Dr. [Superintendent]," my stress level and heartbeat shot up. Way up. If seeing a principal makes me freak out, thanks to past experiences, imagine what my boss's boss's voice does to my fight-or-flight instincts.

I called him back, thinking of all of the (no good, awful, terrible, horrible) things it could be. He answered; I apologized for the delay in returning the call. He said,

"I just wanted to call to thank you for doing such a good job this year."

I stuttered something like a thank you, caught completely off guard.

"You've done a good job, and I know it hasn't been the easiest. There've been a lot of obstacles. But, thank you for the work you're doing."

And that was it.

Today wasn't really an easier day - I was still incredibly busy and juggling way too many balls. But it really helped to hear someone say thank you.

Especially when that someone is my superintendent.

Some Say

While riding home from our speech meet this weekend, I realized that about 1/3 of conversations with my two assistant coaches is about the past. Former students, former meets, and I've heard "of course, the team was a lot larger back then" at least 20 times this year.

They usually don't mean anything by it, and I understand their nostalgia, but it's exhausting to constantly listen to. Some of it's the Rebecca syndrome - I tend to assume that everyone is comparing me to the former speech teacher and that she always wins. I listened to one of my team captains today exclaim how she's surprised they "haven't lost too much" this year, even though they were working without the former teacher.

I keep pointing out that taking 2nd place out of 15 teams isn't losing. And that we've won first place in all but two meets this year. And that we've competed in a lot more tournament (re: bigger schools) meets this year. And that we're competing with less than half as many kids as in the past, which cuts down on the whole winning-by-sheer-numbers thing. Still, in their eyes, things just aren't as good as they used to be.

The State meet is this weekend, Friday and Saturday. In getting ready for that, I worked straight through my prep and lunch. Between the low blood sugar and my exhaustion from working all weekend, I couldn't walk down the stairs at school without gripping the handrail to keep my balance. One of my freshman boys came up to me in class with arms outstretched and announced, "Slaughterhouse, you look like you need a hug." I ate my tangerine while coaching a student in poetry and my string cheese on the drive home.

It was an exhausting day. In fact, as soon as I finish updating you (complaining to you?), I'm heading to bed. This week is going to be brutal, and next week are auditions. I might be able to catch my breath on February 6, though.

This is a downer of an entry. Sorry about that. I'm really quite tired and a lot of that exhaustion is emotional, I think.

In happier news, I get to see some former STMS friends tomorrow night - Brenda's in town visiting, and we're gathering to say "Hey." I'm really looking forward to it.

And now I'm going to bed.

Slaughter on 10th Avenue

My freshmen drama students have dubbed me "Slaughterhouse".

They say it with affection, believe it or not.

I actually like it. It's an improvement, at least, since the best my 8th graders came up with at STMS last year was "Waterbottle".

Now There Is No Choice

I had about two free minutes today at school.

I chose to use that time for a bathroom run.

I ate my lunch today in about four minutes during the passing period between my last two classes, while collecting money for the speech meet hotel rooms tomorrow, reassuring three students who were worried about performing a scene while a fourth was absent, cautioning another student that sneaking up behind me and yelling my name doesn't trigger the safest of reactions, being reminded (simultaneously!) of and IEP meeting after school for one kid at the same time another wants some help with a project, and gathering the papers I needed to take to the stage for the period.

It's not the healthiest way to eat, but it's all the time I had.

I think my friend Jen put it best when she described it as the Sophie's Choice of teaching.

Big Girls Don't Cry

A few years ago, I bought an elliptical from my friend Janelle, cut back to 1500 calories a day, and lost 45 pounds.

Then it plateaued, I moved to Denver, and I started slowly gaining weight back (there may have been a little work stress involved ...coughSTMS!cough).

I certainly haven't gained it all back, but I don't like the path I'm on. So! To help keep me motivated, since the musical season is almost upon us (Yay! for not having time to snack, Boo! for having to rely on take-out and being too exhausted to work out), I figured if I held myself publicly accountable, I might maintain better long-term habits.

I'm testing out a new (to me) app that lets me track food and exercise both on my phone and online. I'm in that opening phase where I enjoy detailing everything I eat. That will quickly become tedious, I'm sure. It does give me a handy sidebar badge, though. Big scary red number!

I don't trust my weight tracking, though. 9 pounds in two days? My weight can fluctuate that much from morning to night. Crazy female-ness. We'll see how I'm doing a week from now.

As for working out, I have my motivators - I like working out while watching "Chuck" or "Dr. Who" - they both have good moments of fast, energetic music. But that's for a 45-minute workout, which I usually don't have time to do during the week.

My new resolution was inspired by a Mamapop staffer. Instead of planning my workout by time and feeling daunted by the 45-minute goal, my new vow is to do at least a mile a day. If it's late and I'm exhausted, all I have to do is a mile. That's doable! And if I'm feeling up to it, I can add more. Yesterday I did 1.5 (in 15 minutes!), today I did 1.8. Short, daily workouts have got to be better than infrequent long ones, right?

We'll see what happens when I go out of town this weekend for another speech meet. My immediate goal is to drop 20 pounds by my trip to New York over spring break.

I'm going to hit "Publish Post" now. Which means I can't take this back - you all will know my plans. Dang my knowledge of how publishing goals makes you accountable for them!

Wish me luck!

Whoops!

Video's playable now. Sorry 'bout that.

We Tell the Story

Here's the commercial I made to announce the musical:



Ring any bells for you, former DPJH peeps?

As I said before, I'm totally recycling as much as I can this year.

It was met with a collective "Huh?" at first, but as I tell them about the characters and the story, the excitement is growing. Which is nice to see. I bet there's a spike for the soundtrack tonight on iTunes.

I Ain't Down Yet

Thank you for the supportive comments, both in the blog and in person!

They've helped me get into a better frame of mind. I'm so enamored with the ideas of either renting the condo and moving abroad to teach or applying for the Arts Management fellowship at the Kennedy Center that I almost wish I'd get non-renewed.

Almost.

I'll keep you posted, of course, but I don't plan to hear anything for several weeks. All the more fun, right?

In happier news, I had a lovely weekend playing tour guide again. Jason flew in Thursday night and, despite there being nothing of especial interest in town this weekend (aside from the stock show, of course), we had fun. Here's a run-down of the highlights:

1. Playing at the Denver Art Museum, where
a. I renewed my teacher's membership,
b. we played in the bungee-cord jungle installation as part of their temporary exhibit:

c. we made postcards:

and d. we played dress up with the sample period costumes:

(The beauty of going in the middle of a school day is getting to play with hands-on parts without any annoying kids getting in the way!)

Oh, we also saw some art, but that's really secondary. Back to the list!

2. Browsing Tattered Cover

3. Wandering around Boulder (it was in the 50's Saturday! Perfect wandering weather!)

4. Watching "Fantastic Mr. Fox" and "Nine"

5. Watching the Golden Globes with Rachel, Ben, and Brian

6. Eating at Damascus Grill, Vesta Dipping Grill, Brasserie 1010, and PeiWei

7. Making Spanish hot chocolate, baguettes, and curry (not all at the same time)

8. Shopping for spices

9. Eating cupcakes late at night, surrounded by hipsters and realizing we were the oldest people in the place

Totally worth it, though.

10. And, of course, a lot of talking. That is one thing we do very well. We stayed up far too late each night doing that, though. After I took Jason to the airport this morning (which was precarious on two accounts - one, because the gas light in my car came on in the middle of Pena Blvd and I panicked because I had no idea how long this new car gave me before running completely out and two, because I was so dang tired), I crawled right back into bed and slept for another two hours.

Aside from some light housework, finishing the commercial to announce the musical tomorrow, working out, and catching up on the interwebs, today was a lazy day.

Like this:


I'm not ready to go back to work tomorrow, but there are some good trees in the road ahead to stand as goalposts, so I'll just focus on the closest and worry about the rest later. "Anonymous" hit the nail on the head with the suggestion for reading time. I haven't read very much at all this week, and that never makes for a happy Amanda. I'll hop on my Kindle before I go to bed and see what enticements I can download instead of planning for my classes tomorrow.

Because first things first, after all.

P.S. I'm very curious who "Anonymous" is, since you offered such good advice. Please comment again and declare yourself! :)

The Worry Song

I've been planning a long entry to update you all about school so far and Humanities in particular. I've even taken pictures to show you of the Cave Art and the Illustrated Epic of Gilgamesh my students have made.

But then I went to a district faculty meeting after school today about the $700,000 that needs to be cut from the budget next year, the $350,000,000 that the state is cutting from education overall, the fact that the school year after next is projected to be even worse, budget-wise, and the superintendent seems focused on the idea of cutting back on licensed staff. The first to go? First-years in the district.

In other words, there's a chance I could lose this job.

Moreover, to hunt for a job in a market with hundreds of other teachers being cut and districts downsizing, chances are that districts will hire the cheap fresh-out-of-university kids rather than a teacher with a Master's and 7 years experience.

Which made me wonder what I could possibly do if I couldn't teach.

So, the Humanities entry will have to wait a few days. I need to get back into a better frame of mind, and I need to clean my apartment up since I've got a guest coming tomorrow.

On one hand, I'm teaching five different subjects, my classes are all full, I'm coaching speech and drama (which, since they hired me out of district, I assume no one else wanted to take on), and I'm doing a good job.

On the other hand, I'm the most recent hire, 4/5 of those classes are electives (i.e. not on state tests), and drama and speech could be reduced to after-school only.

Do I start updating my resume yet again? Cancel my summer travel plans since I may have to live off my savings for a while and how stupid would it be to spend so much to go to Africa when I might not have a job to come back to? Figure out what other kind of job I could possibly get outside of teaching? Or stifle the worries, shift the laundry, pull out the vacuum, and plan lessons on Eyptian death rites and external characterization?

Damn it.

Gee, How I Hate to Get Up in the Morning

It really sucks when you look at the clock at 10:30 am and realize you've been up for seven hours.

Rock Island

Boo-yah!



Try it yourself.

We Are Family

Man, I like my family.

A Visit

Well, it's a good thing I've had my tour guide skills whetted recently, because I get to host another Denver visitor soon - Jason's coming to Denver for Martin Luther King, Jr. weekend. Hurrah!

I spent my last day of vacation running errands (in my new car!), although I did treat myself to a movie.

My parents gave me a subscription to Netflix for Christmas. I set up my queues tonight, and am currently watching some Doctor Who as I type this/fold laundry/do dishes. Awesome. So awesome, in fact, that I just ordered a Roku. I've been considering purchasing the Doctor Who series on DVD. This would ultimately be quite a bit cheaper, since all of the new series is available for instant streaming. And Torchwood is, too. Mmm....


Tomorrow is a teacher work day. Thank goodness. I hope it's an actual work day, not filled up with meetings. I need to make my disclosure statements and some copies of things for the first few days of school. I'm really excited that for the first semester in seven years, I don't have to teach grammar!

Thanks to my parents and Grandma Cook, I left GJ with two boxes full of Humanities materials. I'm worried about teaching the course, mostly because 1) I haven't taught this subject before (although that's nothing new, I suppose) and 2) I feel like I need to know a lot about a lot in order to be good at it. I'm getting there, but it'll be a bumpy first term. I just hope it's not so bumpy that they cut it next year.

Or me. I'm worried about my position being reduced/eliminated. The fact that I watched "Up in the Air" this afternoon probably contributes to that fear. Not the most uplifting movie....

Bedtime! Semester #2 at MTHS starts tomorrow!

Celebration

My blog turns 5 years old today!

Take a look at the archives list to the right - oh, how it's grown over the years! From 62 entries the first year to 375 in 2009. The photos I posted from my Yay 30! may have skewed those stats a bit, though....

On a related note, 7 years ago this week I officially started teaching. I'd like to think that I've changed dramatically from those first days at Dead President Junior High, but since I'm surrounded by materials at the moment, planning my first few weeks of Humanities, somehow I don't think that much has changed.

Good Vibrations

Good-bye Sentra!

Hello Vibe!

And thanks to mes tres bons parents, Ben, Betty, and car salesman Fuzzy (pictured above), who defied stereotypes by being very nice.

Happy New Year!

Oh, man. Over two weeks since my last post? I have been a slacker!

A brief run-down on what I've been doing:

1. Took the speech kids to Cheyenne, WY for a inter-state meet.

It was an enormous pain-in-the-tuckus to make that trip happen, and I didn't particularly want to do it in the first place. Still, it was a good meet to attend, and the whole trip went smoothly, without incident. Aside from leaving a kid at the Carls, Jr. we stopped at for lunch, that is. No worries, though. We spotted him sprinting through the parking lot towards the bus in time.

2. Wrapped up the semester.

MTHS' schedule is set up so that the students get a year's worth of credit within a semester. Which means when I go back next Wednesday, I'll have all new classes. It also means I'm done teaching English for the year (yay!).

Thanks to some good advance prep on my part, plus the way the finals schedule worked out, I actually graded all my English class' finals with half an hour to spare by the end of the last school day (drama and speech were performance-based, so I graded those on the spot). That meant I had grades posted by the time I walked out of there for the break. Yay for that!

3. Home-made Christmas.

I learned how to make marshmallows for my colleagues-gifts this year. I tried it on my own first, and called my sister when the first batch turned out poorly. She gave me a few hints over the phone and reassured me that it would all be fine. Not so. The second batch was an identical failure. Rachel then very kindly offered to come over the next night and let me observe her process. By batch #5, I was a fluffy-mint-marbled-colored-marshmallow pro!

Once I got to Grand Junction, I kicked into crafty mode and made the rest of my gifts this year. Rachel and I collaborated on a gift to our dad - we bought him an Eddie Bauer jacket and made and attached patches of the various companies he uses. I think the idea came from this New Yorker cartoon.

I also designed and sewed two couch arm-rest craft organizers for my mom and Rachel (adapted from this idea)and embroided a set of handwarmers for Jenn based on two pictures from the Tracy Aviary website (she works there).

Really, why I decided to make most of my gifts this busy year, I don't know. But they all turned out well, and I'm glad.

4. A Late Christmas

We celebrated on the 26th this year so we could all be together. On Christmas Day, my parents hosted their annual Christmas Board Game Extravaganza where I discovered I know far more about the Simpsons than I thought.

I got many lovely gifts for Christmas, including a new suitcase, a nook, a Cricut machine, and a spinning wheel to share with Rachel. Travel, reading, and craftiness - perfect!

5. To Utah for a Birthday Party and New Year's.

After Christmas, we all drove up to Layton for a party for my grandmother's 80th birthday. The day after that, the various relatives, my parents, and I headed for a winter camp up above Sundance. We spent two nights there, including New Year's Eve. I went sledding, worked on some school projects, played a lot of games with my cousins, and even went snowshoeing for the first time. In the light of a blue moon. On New Year's Eve. That was a good first.

In the end, we were all rather tired, so we celebrated the new year an hour early with horns and confetti poppers provided by my grandmother, then spent 20 minutes cleaning up the confetti, then played Quiddler while the real new year rolled in.

6. Car Shopping.

After 11 years, my car is starting to be more trouble than it's worth. I took it in to get a free oil change right before driving down to Junction, and walked out with a list of $700 worth of repairs recommended by the car shop. I didn't get any done at the time, since I was rushing out of town first thing the next morning to try to beat a snowstorm. When I got to Junction, some green liquid was dripping from it. My mom declared it unfit to drive and suggested we go car shopping "just to see what they have".

With Rachel knitting in the car and my mom, Ben (a hidden treasure-trove of car information), and Ben's mom (a safety expert who nicely offered her opinion) in tow, we visited a salesman my parents know and trust. I looked at some new models, but balked at the prices (Africa! I want to go to Africa! I don't need working brakes, right? I'd rather travel!). Upon Ben's recommendations, I was particularly interested in Vibes/Matrices. Lo, they had a used one. I test drove it, and it's actually in great shape. 2007, only one owner, 26,860 miles on it, and it's got almost everything I was looking for.

So, tomorrow I'm most likely buying a car. I don't have the title to my current one with me (since this was an unexpected purchase), so I don't know if I'll be able to trade it in. If it does go through, I'll post a picture tomorrow!